Vacation, Meant to be Spent Alone

When I go on vacation with kids or in general, I want to make the most of it AND relax… kind of contradictory

So when we arrive at the AFB after 11 hours in the car we meet my brother at the gate so we can get tags on our car, long story short my husband is really impressed with his picture here….

He wanted me to post this, lol.

 

Seriously though, obviously we got to my brother’s and relaxed, got the car unpacked and we settled into our vacay mode. My goal for this entire trip was to read a book, a whole book. I used to love reading when I was younger but since working full time, having kids and getting married, it’s been hard to finish a book. I start lots of books but I have so much going on that sitting down reading a book gets pushed to the back of the priority list. So I made a goal for myself, other than hanging with my brother, read an entire book. So I started reading as soon as we get settled. I should take this time to explain this is a 250 page book meant for middle schoolers; but I have to start somewhere.

When I go on vacation with kids or in general, I want to make the most of it AND relax… kind of contradictory. So in the morning, after feeding the baby and making my coffee I was trying to decide what to do with the beautiful day67541160_2471292023100298_7671030479369273344_n

The kids were already pestering me to go to the pool, or go to the park… my desire to relax meant less than nothing to them, lol. So we came up with a plan to take them to the splash pad, mostly so I don’t have to put on a swimsuit

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I did take some pretty fantastic pictures!!

The rest of the vacation was pretty rainy, so we spent time inside. We walked around the exchange, which is an on base store and just looked around. There was an author who was selling her books and I proudly bought one! Her name is Joy Garcia and she writes children’s storys about her dogs and their adventures. I was super excited to be able to support her and her dream because it is mine!

The kids enjoyed playing on the Switch with their uncle and I got to read and finish my book. I loved every morning waking up to this beautiful view DSCN4907

The vacation was over way too soon, and on Monday morning we got up at 5am, I said goodbye to my little brother and started the stupidly long journey back home. It was basically uneventful except we hit more traffic so it was a 12hr journey. We got home safely and our lives went back to normal.

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Vacation, Had To Get Away

Less than an hour into the trip we had a baby screaming and 2 kids whining, asking if we were there yet…. SERIOUSLY????

So here we are, 2 adults, 2 kids and one baby packed into a car for what should have been a 9hr drive to go visit one of my brothers in Florida. Tobias is not happy because I woke him up instead of the other way around, he wouldn’t latch on (I am breastfeeding him, which I do not know if I have mentioned) and he is already in his car seat, which he hates. I was hoping the kids were going to go back to sleep since we woke them up so early, but not so much.

Less than an hour into the trip we had a baby screaming and 2 kids whining, asking if we were there yet…. SERIOUSLY???? To say that I had explained how long this trip was going to be 100 times is an understatement.

My plan for the trip was to pump milk by hand and have the kids feed him with a bottle to help prolong stopping. So when the baby started getting fussy I looked in my diaper bag for my pump, not there. I looked in the Walmart bag of snacks, not there and my brain flashed to the kitchen counter where I remember them being last and I start freaking out. My husband being the calm rational soul that he is pulls over into a parking lot so I can feed the really upset baby before anything else. It takes Tobias a few minutes to calm down before he will finally latch on, but first feeding is successful and I change his diaper to get that out of the way. Next Matt proposes we look for a Wal-Mart to buy a pump for the trip to continue with my plan, he stays so calm and tells me over and over again that I am not a terrible mom because I forgot something. As I start to calm down I remember picking up the pump and putting it in the glove box with the nipples and the milk saving bags. So we are back on the road, only 40 minutes behind schedule.

Being in the car for 9(according to GPS) hours with your spouse could bring some to commit murder, and probably has. I on the other hand LOVE car trips with my man, he is my actual best friend and I love our time together. We make the kids use headphones in the car so we have some privacy to discuss whatever we want. Matt and I have some pretty funny conversations together because even though we are pretty different, we both think in a very similar manner.

For example, I am not sure what brought up Alaska, but I mentioned that my brother(the one we were not going to see) used to want to live in Alaska. That made me think of the movie The Proposal and as I was getting ready to bring that up Matt says “That was something they got right in The Proposal….” and he drifts off “You mean the shades to block out the sun which doesn’t set for awhile??” I reply because I was thinking the same thing. “Yeah, he says” and I say “Just like 30 days of night… or is that the sex movie, you know, with Josh Harnett??” He tells me I was thinking of the correct movie, the vampire one and then we start racking our brain for the name of the sex or lack there of movie that he did (40 days and 40 nights btw) and that makes us wonder, what happened to Josh Harnett??? Then we get into a discussion about how Chris Pine, who Matt insists came on the scene at the same time as Josh, just picked better movies and Josh just went away. I knew this wasn’t accurate so I risked getting extremely car sick to research this on my phone and I was correct. I did get extremely nauseous, but won that knowledge competition.

There isn’t much to do in a car when you have pretty bad car sickness(???) so you can talk, keep messing with the thermostat or radio volume so his OCD fixes it without him realizing it, watch your husband’s facial expressions as people act stupid on the road, laugh at him when he does something stupid, LEFT LANE ENDS, oh I should get over!! What did you think it was going to say??

Well we were in the car for 11 hours and made like 6 stops, mostly because of Tobias, but we finally got to the base and we started our vacations; but first, we had to get passes to get on base…

Vacation, All I Ever Wanted

Did you remember your camera

Have you ever been on vacation with kids??

Was it relaxing and stress free???

Hahaha, nope. But we take trips anyway. So we packed our car up and took 2 kids and one 6 month old on what should have been a 9hr trip to… dun dun dun… Florida!

No, we didn’t go to Disney or take the kids (me) to Harry Potter World at Universal Studios. We went to the panhandle and visited my brother who is stationed there with the Air Force.

We have been planning the trip for a couple of months and I was super excited to go see my brother but preparing for a trip with pets, kids and a husband is a lot of work.

I had to get someone who would come over and clean out my rats cage and the cat litter boxes; introducing the best of friend you could have, Jude! She so graciously agreed to clean the 2 nastiest things in my house while we were gone and that was a huge weight off my shoulders. The rest was cleaning, packing and preparing 5 people for a really long trip in a vehicle that could defintely be bigger(Honda Accord).

Luckily both kids used their birthday money to get a tablet this year AND Netflix, YouTube and MoviesAnywhere let you download movies/videos/episodes to watch offline…. THANK YOU!!!! I don’t know how my parents put up with us back in the day (other than placing the fear of God in us). We went through several days before and made sure that they had their movies and videos downloaded.

When packing we had to make sure to condense the clothes into 2 suitcases because even though the Accord has a pretty big trunk, fitting everything was going to be a tight squeeze. Years of uprooting my life as a military brat payed off!! Got it all in, with barely any room to spare.

With the plan in the place and the coffee pot set to start at 4:30am my husband and I finally went to be around 10; ready to rush out the door the next day by 5am (in reality 5:30 because we have kids).

The first alarm went off at 4 in the morning and I was not ready to adult, lol. I used to have to get up at 2:30 in the morning for work and my only thought when I heard that alarm was HOW???? I immediately fell back asleep and then my backup alarm went off at 4:15…. I had forgotten about the trip in my exhaustion, but that was why there was a backup.

But with the second alarm I was up and ready to go! I started my rounding up of the humans in the house; the baby was awake a lot that night/morning so he was not happy that I was waking him up.

We were in the car all ready to go by 5:15am!! I was super proud and as we were pulling out of the neighborhood my brilliant husband says to me, “Did you remember your camera?” NOPE… So back we went because I don’t want to go anywhere without that right now. But still 5:25 on the road, I was pretty content with myself!

Thus begins the road trip…

A picture is worth 1000 words

Hopefully I didn’t scare away my 4 followers.

So I am not a sad person, I suffer from depression and anxiety BUT I’m not sad. Reading through my posts these past few weeks makes me seem like a sad, kind of (really) whiny/bitchy type. I can be this way Fo Sho… but in general, I’m happy. I think that I have had a lot on my plate and with the new baby, house and marriage I’m struggling with ME.

I’ve been doing better about setting time aside to work on the behind the scenes part of my business, reading books on marketing and creating a successful business… stuff like that

I even made that bookmark… I know, its awesome! And I have actually been taking pictures again. I have actually always enjoyed being behind the camera. When I was in high school, my family lived on Okinawa, Japan. My parents would drag us around the island to see the sights and the history; I usually got to capture the moments with my parents MASSIVE digital camera that used floppy discs (yeah, I’m THAT old). I took videos and made deep I insightful commentary on what we were doing (my dad would threaten to take the camera away and I would stop). I really enjoyed that. Whenever we went on family vacations or whatever, I took pictures. I discovered the “selfie” one day and stopped taking pictures of other things…. until I had my babies, then I had to capture all those moments. With the advent of smart phones with pretty good cameras I put down the physical camera and just used the super portable thing I was taking anways.

I was given advice by my family photographer (you don’t have one of those??)

Mia Rose Photography

She takes pretty great pictures!! Anyway, she was giving me advice for pictures of my products. So for the first time in at least a year, I took my real camera out of the bag. The feel of the camera in my hand and the strap around my neck (I am SUPER clumsy) felt amazing!! It just felt natural and some of the pictures turned out really nice!!

Here’s a screenshot because they are actually saved on my computer, not my phone. Honestly, the screenshot doesn’t do it justice. But anywhoser… I loved having the camera in my hands again.

I actually got a free Nikon N50 from a Facebook resale page. It takes film so I have been working on my photography again, kind of old school style. I will be taking 2 rolls of film to be developed on Monday and I am really hoping they turn out well, but either way, I am having fun capturing moments and that is all that matters.

So that is my non-depressive blog post. Stay tuned for another whiny one soon!! Hopefully I didn’t scare away my 4 followers.

SAHM

I am exhausted and should sleep but if I do I don’t know when I’ll have time to write this.

I am writing this at midnight after taking my first REAL shower in about a week. I am dripping wet, sitting next to my bed. My legs are stinging because I rushed through shaving again. Better to have smooth legs in pain versus the forest that was growing. I am exhausted and should sleep but if I do I don’t know when I’ll have time to write this.

For the second time in my life, I am a stay at home mom (SAHM).

This was not my game plan after I got out of my first marriage. My game plan was actually to remain a recluse for the rest of my life BUT that is another blog for another time.

Now, I love my kids (as most moms would say) and I know that I am blessed to be at home with them, but I hate having people(women) tell me that in their bitchy tone. “I wish I was in your shoes…” “I would love to be at home all day” “what do you even do with yourself…”????

I’ll tell you Karen.

I work. My days start at about 6am and I’m working until 9pm. And guess what??? There are no state mandated breaks or lunches. I usually have to eat while holding a baby, in case you haven’t done that, it’s not pretty.

Today I was peed, puked, pooped on. I usefully have breast milk on me And now baby food as well! I had a migraine and a fever for the majority of the day. My son still screamed in my face for an hour because his gums and ears hurt and he was also running a fever!

A picture of us after running our errands this morning. I cleaned the kitchen, living room, my room and did about 6 loads of laundry. I had to cook dinner, lunch and breakfast and remember medicine for 2 kids. It’s summer vacation so I also had to have my big kids do their summer work. I also have my business to run so I have to continue on the website and plan new pieces. I an reading books on how to make my business successful AND occasionally I have to work out because I’m fat. Oh and I’m married so I have to make sure I don’t let wifey duties slip up.

So that is my day and it’s pretty average. So, I’m not just sitting around on my ass (though my ever expanding waist line says differently) AND I’m not getting paid. So maybe, Karen, have respect for the SAHM or shut your mouth. I earn absolutely every dollar, I don’t get paid.

Seriously though, I love that I get to be at home with my kids. I love that I’m reading, The Littles, with them and that we do science experiments. Only having the one income means that we don’t have a lot of extra money for fun, but I love finding cheap or free stuff to do with them. They are only young once and I want them to have great memories to look back on!

Took a turn

The job that I had once loved had taken a turn for the worst and I hated life.

So about 6 months ago I quit a job that I had been at for over 5 years. I was a manager at this job and had always intended to move up the ladder, but their practices made it difficult. The job that I had once loved had taken a turn for the worst and I hated life. Everyday showing up was absolute agony. My last day was such a crazy ordeal to me. I showed up at 6am, almost 9 months pregnant to push a truck, basically by myself because no one else was scheduled. I worked my five and a half hours(I had cut back hours for health reasons) and I left. No one said goodbye or even cared. I had worked for the company for 5 years, given them literal blood, sweat and tears, sacrificed time with my kids and hurt myself in more than one way to get my job done and none of it mattered.

That is retail.

I do want to say that in those 5 years I met some amazing people, I even married one of them! And 2 more of them were bridesmaids. I grew so much as a manager/leader and I took away some great memories; it hurt a little that my leaving wasn’t remarked by anyone.

Since then, my life has grown infinitely better. I am a stay at home mom who is also starting a business. I have friends that I occasionally hang out with and an amazing husband who, even when I want to kill him, I love more than anything. Life isn’t perfect but it is pretty damn close. I miss making money though, I get very frustrated because I am not contributing monetarily to the household, that’s really my pride speaking. I do a lot for my family and often it goes unappreciated but I still have a sense of accomplishment at the end of the day. I am working on taking time out for me each day though. I blog here, read a book

and I am trying to work on my screenplay, I need more hours in the day or to manage my time more wisely. Right now, for example I am laying across my bed with my eyes barely open because baby boy did not sleep well last night but still woke up at 6 this morning. I should be sleeping but I’m waiting for my husband to finish his D&D game(yes I married a NERD), I like to fall asleep with him.

Tiger Dog

He loved me and only me

I cleaned out my rats cage today! This is a chore, especially since I have 5 rats!! Yes… you read that correctly. FIVE.

I also have 2 cats.

This time last year, I had a dog. We don’t have him anymore and this makes me really sad. Not because we don’t have a dog, but how we had to give him away. I’ve felt guilty about it for 10 months. We adopted him, like you should do because there are too many dogs in this world, but it wasn’t a happy ending for anyone. He was fine at first, some separation anxiety (severe anxiety) which lead to destruction of our rental. But the biting is what ended our relationship. He bit my daughter in the face and my son on the shoulder. He tried to bite my husband in his face and on the same day attacked 3 dogs and 2 more people. All of this occured and we gave him away and I still feel guilty. I tried so hard, training, vet visits for anxiety medicine, doggie day care for exercise. He loved me and only me. He wanted to just be mine, but I couldn’t be just his mom. I had 2 kids, who he hurt, and a baby on the way. I had to put them first.

I’m sorry Khan. My beautiful tiger dog. I miss you.