It’s not what it seems

Eric…. it’s not what it seems…. it’s not what it seems —- name that movie

I took a hiatus from blogging this summer. It was a good decision, I went to a pretty dark place. Also, life was boring.

The Corona summer is coming to an end and it has sucked. Probably the worse summer ever. We’ve been bored, stuck in the house, lazy, depressed.

To end the summer with a bang I got sick, really, really sick. I was struggling to catch my breath, I had a fever, stomach issues, dizziness, my throat was killing me, my head was killing me and I was so sore… and I had a cough… smokers with emphysema have a milder cough.

These symptoms completely knocked me on my ass for almost a week before I got tested for Covid. There were moments I thought I was going to die, I was so weak and I couldn’t breathe. I was sure I had caught the plague.

But, things were not what they seemed and it was just the flu. It took a solid 2 weeks to feel better, but I survived!

Summertime highlights:

  • I started a Beachbody program and finished 4 weeks before I fell down the stairs and broke my toes.
  • We finally laid my Nanny to rest.
  • Went to Pennsylvania for the first time in 4 years, saw family I hadn’t seen in over 15 years.
  • I went to the beach twice
  • Got to see fireworks
  • My daughter’s lyra performance was beautiful
  • Both my boys went through huge growth spurts
  • Started a YouTube channel
  • Gained a bunch of weight after breaking my toes and almost have 3 chins
  • Watched The Last Airbender and Legend of Korra, love the first and not the second
  • Watched New Girl again and realized I only watch it for CeCe and Schmidt’s storyline. Jess is super annoying
  • Got really into Twilight again and have watched all the movies A LOT and have re read the first 2 books so far

So that was basically my summer. Oh yeah it was just my birthday and I turned 36. Normally I would post a picture of my face and write something cute about how I look, but there is nothing cute about how I look right now… too much weight, acne from wearing masks, bags under my eyes from lack of sleep and my hair is in frightening disarray.

It’s been a rough summer but we are falling into my favorite time of the year. The kids and I are successfully homeschooling and I think good things are on the way!!

How was your summer?

I’ll reveal the source of my movie quote in the next blog!

Is Love Blind?

I have had an intense love/hate relationship with a reality show, in that I hate myself for how much I love this show.

So there is a reality show on Netflix that is taking over the world and my Facebook page.

I have opinions on the show and I will be revealing SPOILERS if you have not finished or watched the series and want to, don’t read this.

So the basis of the show are 30 people, 15 of each sex. They “meet” in pods without ever actually seeing each other unless they are engaged. Most people focused in on a select person quite quickly, but there were some hearts broken and tears cried.

When all the dates were done we were left with 6 couples: Kelly and Kenny, Jessica and Mark, Lauren and Cameron, Diamond and Carlton, Barnett and Amber, Damien and Giannina.

So after these couples are engaged, they finally meet and they are swept away to Mexico to connect physically. They are there for a week and then they have to rejoin the real world, phones and families. They have 3 weeks until their wedding.

I’ll be blunt, Diamond and Carlton are the first couple to bite the dust. Carlton is fluid, which means he has dated both sexes. He waited till they were engaged and in Mexico to tell Diamond and she felt betrayed. She tried to tell him how she felt and in my opinion she was calm and kind even though she was given quite a lot of new information. Carlton did not handle that well, he was obviously used to people judging him for his past. He just assumed that she was not ok with it and verbally attacked her. She responded to his aggression with her own aggression. There was a screaming match by the pool, where they both said mean things. So they did not make it out of Mexico.

I want to say that I am sad for Diamond and Carlton, they were a great couple. Their outfits the day he proposed matched, and that was not planned. They had these really great outgoing personalities.

I understand her not just being like “ok” that’s cool. I have been where she was, well I was dating someone, not engaged, and when he told me I freaked out a little. I had questions and fears and it took some adjustment time. That was another huge difference in our situation is TIME. I also understand Carlton’s fear to tell her, he loved her and didn’t want to lose her. He shouldn’t have had to stress about his sexuality though, he is who he is and he deserves to be loved. That fear or stress does not in any way justify how he reacted though, he verbally attacked her and said nasty things.

I’m really upset how people have reacted to both of them. They have gotten death threats and that is total BS. This is a TV show, but these are REAL people, who have lives and real feelings. That’s all I’m going to say about that.

Kenny and Kelly were the couple that did not make it that actually surprised me. They honestly were so perfect that it was almost boring. Even when they met each other parents, there was no drama. Their parents supported their relationship 100%. Apparently Kelly wasn’t physically attracted to Kenny enough and when it came time to their wedding she said no. When it came time for the reunion Kenny was in a serious relationship and very happy and Kelly was single and full of┬áregret. That is really all that needs to be said, Kenny was great and Kelly made a dumb mistake.

Kelly, intense attraction is not something that lasts forever. There are ups and downs in relationships, what is amazing is the intense emotional connection that you get with open, honest communication and time spent together that beats any intense physical attraction.

Mark and Jessica… mark and jessica… jessica, jessica, jessica…. oh messica

Most of the memes about this show are about Jessica and Mark. I could write a novel about all the issues and red flags but I don’t want to. Jessica and Mark connected on their very first date. Anyone watching could see there was a “spark”. Well Jessica also fell for Barnett but in a flirty and fun way; there was nothing substantial there. Barnett said something dumb, she “broke” it off with Mark and was ready to fully commit to Barnett. He backtracked and she went crawling back to Mark, basically so she didn’t end up alone. When he took her back he said “I know my worth and I’m no one’s second choice”<—— I paraphrased. He then spent like 6 more (extremely uncomfortable, for us) episodes literally being the obvious second choice.

Mark, seriously man, learn your worth. There were so many red flags that he ignored and then had the audacity to act surprised that she said “no” at their wedding.

Jessica, at the reunion you said you realized that you needed help and I hope you are serious. You have a drinking problem, you strung poor Mark around like a (blind) puppy. You threw yourself at an engaged man, lied to his fiance about it and blamed it on the whiskey.

But the worst thing you did Messica… is GIVE YOUR DOG WINE!!! That is not ok dude… major party foul. Jessica you are a beautiful (on the outside) woman. Get your shit together.

Damien and Giannina. I honestly love this couple. If you have watched the show I know it sounds crazy because they seem to have issues, but I honestly think it was a lot of how the footage was cut. I can also tell that Damien isn’t normally a very open and emotional person and GiGi brings that out of him and it bothers him. Gigi is also extremely passionate and a fighter, in every aspect of her life. Sheis like a real life Telemundo character, always yelling and being dramatic. When she went all in for this relationship she went ALL IN. People have mentioned that her behavior is gaslighting or abusive, I disagree. It’s not perfect, but I don’t think it’s out of malice, maybe lack of maturity. Damien can be a stereotypical white guy, quiet and to himself. He’s kind of boring on screen, but in interviews Gigi says he is actually hilarious.

I just need to say to GiGi, butterflies don’t last boo. If you want butterflies don’t get married or have kids because telling your husband the same thing over and over or listening to him snore while you are up with a screaming newborn for the 7th time in one night KILLS all the butterflies… they dead. True love outlasts those butterflies though

Damien is actually very mature and risks losing GG on their wedding day because he says NO!! He tries to tell her why, but not before her Telemundo exit, running out of the building, crying, falling, yelling. Happily though, they are together, just not married. They are taking their time.

Amber and Barnett

I did not like these 2 at first. I honestly thought she was a gold digger or at least someone who was just there to see how much she could get for herself. I thought Barnett was a f@$kboy, there is no better way of saying that. I started to like him more as the show progressed. He stayed faithful completely to Amber, even though Jessica was throwing herself at him. He was obviously not trying to start drama because he didn’t tell Amber what was happening with Messica. He is the kind of guy who wants to avoid the unnecessary drama, but he married a literal firecracker. During the show, they made Amber look pretty irresponsible and lazy. She didn’t have a job and she has student loans and a maxed out Sephora credit card. But in interviews since, she has told her side. She also was completely honest at the reunion when she talked about marriage expectations and confronting Jessica. She mentioned that being married wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows and that she had considered a divorce before she realized that what they needed was to talk to each other. I think that took bravery to admit that. She also let Jessica know that she is a “shiesty bitch”, her words, that I may have spelled incorrectly. She was attacked online because she wasn’t quiet and just let it go, but honestly I wouldn’t have. This woman pretended to be your friend, lied to your face and tried to undermine your relationship?? That is not ok, and needs to be addressed.

So now I am in love with the Barnetts and I am wishing them love and happiness.

Now for America’s version of royalty…. Lauren and Cameron

Honestly I don’t have much to say about these 2. They are solid, they are beautiful, they are perfect for each other. They are obviously an interracial couple and there are challenges with that. I have experienced that myself, very real and sometimes disheartening. But the way these 2 fit… its unreal

All I can say for them is God bless. I can not wait to see pictures of the beautiful angels you create together. They will have their own YouTube channel and post videos, can’t wait!!

So what was your take on the show? Who is your favorite couple? Do you think any of them will make it?