The Inbetween

I realize that’s not a real word.

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted a blog and I’ve been feeling guilty about it! I really enjoy taking time out to write these and I’ve been working on the same blog for over a week and it just isn’t right yet.

This past month has been so busy for me it’s hard to concentrate on writing right now.

August is the home of our anniversaries (marriage and dating), both of our birthdays (husband and mine) and back to school for the kids. So we’ve been busy!

The business received several orders for artworks, signs and coasters.

I started working out 2-3 times a week with other moms (I am not a social person so that’s new to me). In the same category, I’ve been talking to the moms at the kids bus stop. I am almost considering a girls night out with them… but it may be too soon.

I got put back on meds for anxiety and depression, that is an ongoing adventure that’s getting a blog for sure!

I’ve been working some weekends cleaning houses, which is ironic because my house is usually a MESS!

My sister is talking to me again! I thought she was mad at me… I tend to say really stupid/hurtful things and usually not on purpose so I was really worried I did it again… but she was just busy (so she wasn’t really not speaking to me, but I felt unspoken to) .

Life has been pretty great lately, I’m feeling proud of myself for everything that I’ve got going on and the meds are working so well that I’m not worried about the other shoe dropping!

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Life Update

It has been over 4 months since my last post and it honestly feels like an entire lifetime has passed. My fiance and I are actually married, though most of our family doesn’t know, we are having an actual wedding later this month. We have moved to a new place, that is bigger and more expensive(which still makes me nervous). I am pregnant… which was part of the plan in February, getting pregnant in February not giving birth then. I am getting tired just thinking about everything that has happened in the last few months. There were days when it was just too much and I found myself crying in the shower when everyone else slept.

The first challenge that I(we, just assume I am always including my husband)  faced was finding a new place to live. We were living with my BFF/co-worker and though I love her, we were cramping each other styles. So we needed to find our own place and something much bigger, we were basically squeezing 4 people into 2 small rooms. We knew from the beginning that we needed at least 3 bedrooms so each kid could have their own room. It was really location, location, location and kind of price as well.  We were living in an area that my son was doing well in school but my daughter was not. My son has ADHD and he really needs a VERY patient teacher that has experience with kids like him. He got a lot of one on one attention because of his IEP, but the school genuinely seemed to care about his well being and education. I need to point out that this was not a “great” school, test scores were not the best but the school really was. My daughter did not thrive in the school because it was not one of those “great” and challenging schools. She is super smart and very determined to get things done and always be the best, but she was not challenged and was actually made fun of by the other kids for being smart. Eventually she just gave into peer pressure and stop challenging herself. So there is our first challenge, do we try to stay in the area we are in for Brian or move to a better school district for Mackenzie.

Well that brings me to our second challenge, price. Matt and I are not poor by any means but we also don’t have enough money for $2000 a month in rent. We are trying to save money to eventually buy a house, so we have to consider that. We set our budget at $1300 a month and we stuck to it. That budget quickly eliminated where we were currently staying, the cheapest rent for a 3 bedroom was $1500. So we started looking at other areas. If you are familiar with Charlotte, NC you know that you will find some pretty cheap rents in some really questionable areas so I had to be a housing detective. I had found a website that actually showed me the crime rate in the area and then of course I had to research the schools.

The research led me into South Carolina and the Fort Mill school area. We found a place that had an amazing rent and started the application process. We both got really excited about the place and started making our exit arrangements with our current place. We passed the credit/background check but when it came to fiances we made too much money…. now as I mentioned earlier, we are not poor but we are not rich either and that blew our mind and broke my heart. So then panic mode set in, we are only a few weeks from the end of our lease and we had to start the process all over again.

My anxiety was in over drive and I was frantically messaging any place I could that had availability. There was a place that I had fallen in love with a few years ago but could never afford by myself and it had the exact model that I wanted available on the day that I needed it. It was like fate. I called and put a deposit on it that day. There ended our new home drama.